You can read about dreams “till the cows come home” as we say in the South and not get to the end. Dreams are a Big Deal. You’ll find them in the Bible, in history, legends, and family stories. Dreams have shown the dreamer solutions to problems, new inventions, and scared us to death at the same time.

Start with the idea that dreams knock at your door to bring you a message. If you ignore the knock, the dream may knock louder until it gets your attention, perhaps in a nightmare. Even though, we’ve trained to see dreams as “just” a dream, the brain goes right on producing several every night. If you interrupt the dreams (crying babies, illness, partying late) the brain will create more the next night. Biology and psychology need dreams, it appears. T

Back to my metaphor of a dream knocking at your door—you ask, what do you want me to know? The dream unfolds the message. Sometimes it unfolds the messages in a series of dreams, much like chapters in a novel. You wouldn’t rip one page out of the novel and expect to know the whole story. Thus, the reason many people keep dream journals. A few words, a feeling, etc. can reconnect you to the dream.

There are many theories about dreams and just as many suggestions about how to understand them. And, they fall into categories, too.

Here are a few:

1. The recurring dream. These dreams can start in childhood and continue for a long time, seemingly at random times.
2. The Pre-Cognitive Dream: These dreams come true. Or, at least give you a dejavu experience.
3. The continuing daydream: This dream continues the work you do during the day. You rake leaves all day and you dream of raking leaves.
4. Death dreams – often comes to us when something needs to be put to rest.
5. The “it was not a dream” experience – This dream usually involves seeing people who have died and they appear to us to tell us they are OK.
6. The “what The heck?” Dream: This dream doesn’t make any sense to us. It is full of symbolism, metaphors, people, etc. that leaves us feeling it was a weird dream.

If you read Sigmund Freud’s book written in 1900, The Interpretation of Dreams, you would discover he thought all dreams were personal, from your unconscious, and were mostly about sex and aggression.  He thought dreams were like a 3-act-play in that there is a beginning or introduction of the problem, a middle, and an ending where the solution is delivered.

His colleague, Carl G Jung, has given us another view. He, too, could agree that dreams come from our own minds, but he added that some dreams tap into the Collective Unconscious, and we have dreams that are not of our own personal experiences but of historical and cultural knowledge. In other words, a there is a spiritual component to our dreams. Some Church or Christian groups have dream groups as much as they may offer prayer groups.

Both Jung and Freud and more modern theorists believe the story of the dream is not the meaning of the dream. We start with the story and investigate the words, feelings, numbers, colors, etc. In other words, it’s a puzzle and we are the mystery.

In Gestalt theory, we ask the dreamer to experience every aspect of the dream. For example, if the dreamer describes a road where lots of cars and people are traveling, you might ask the dreamer “what is it like to be the road? The travelers? The vehicles? All of that information tells a story.

Of course, dreams sometimes have a sense of humor. One person had recurring dreams about going into a house with a U-shaped porch. The floors on the inside of the house were covered in rugs that had rats running under them. She would wake up horrified. I suggested the dream introduced itself by saying this dream is about YOU.  And, since she had just married and blended their families, she referred to the children as rug-rats. It was simply a dream about the anxiety of how life had changed, with a twist of humor.

It could be if you “wake up on the wrong side of the bed”, it is a result of a lingering feeling from your last dream. Feelings are one thing about a dream that does not have to be interpreted. Anxiety is anxiety; wonder is wonder; fear is fear; and well, you get it.

Sweet dreams to you all.

So many people, including me sit down to write and feel stuck. Or, many people (including me), lament that we don’t have time to write. You may have something that’s been in your heart for a while, and you want to share it. But you keep thinking, “I’ll do it in my free time.”. I get it.

Here are some tips that I’ve learned along the way to help you be successful:

Step 1: Plan to write.

Think of project managers. They plan each step of a project. Otherwise, nothing gets done. Sure, spontaneous writing can still be a part of the writing but without a plan, it’s hit and miss.

Let go of ideas about having to “be in the mood” or being in a mountain cabin to write. That’s nice but not necessary. Plan it. Do it. In small steps. Maybe a page a day to start is enough.

Step 2:  Write an outline.

By outline, I mean just that. An outline of what you want to write. If you’re writing a self-help book, look at other self-help books and study the outlines of their books.  Name your chapters. They can always be changed. Just start.

Step 3: Write your crappy first draft.

It won’t be pretty. Don’t worry about grammar and punctuation now. Write each chapter or the whole story. That’s it. Tell yourself it’s okay if it’s rough or crappy.

Step 4: Rewrite the First draft.

Start with a fresh mind and read your draft. Take out what doesn’t work and add in what’s needed. That should be all you do that day.

Step 5: Edit your First Draft.

Congratulations. You already have a first draft of your story, book, play, poem, etc. Read through the entire manuscript, chapter by chapter. Does it flow? Do you make your points clear? How do you think your reader will feel when reading your book? Make notes then make changes.

Step 6: Let Go.

If you are looking to publish something, send your manuscript to a professional editor. Not a friend, although it is tempting. Once you are at this stage, it’s time to bring in a professional.

If you are writing something that you’d like to use in a class or in your life in some other way, but you don’t want  to publish it, ask a couple friends or family members to read it, and get their feedback.

If you are writing something just for you to get it off your chest, but it’s not for anyone else to see, you can skip this step.

Step 7: Do a final review.

Review the final draft of your manuscript. Read it through again. There can always be improvements, but you know when it is time to be Done. This is true whether you are writing something just for yourself to explore something or solve a problem or if you want to share it with the world.

Reviewing your writing can help you learn or see something new every time you read it back to yourself.

Whether you are off to the printer after this or on to whatever your next endeavor is after this exploration is done, best of luck to you!

If you think you’d like to explore with other people, sign up to get notified of when my live virtual writing retreat will be starting this fall!

Once upon a time, people began telling stories and we haven’t stopped. We spend our days telling them and listening to them from our favorite story tellers. News, podcasts, print, social media and books. We can’t get enough. We’re biologically and psychologically wired for stories. And, it doesn’t stop at night. Dreams come to tell us stories about ourselves and what we’re learning or how to understand our experiences.

If you’ve ever thought you were not creative, think again. Consider how effortlessly you create whole movies with sets, characters, plot, colors, and dialog. It just comes to you. So, yes, you are very creative. You wrote, directed, and starred in the story up to seven times every night. Aren’t you amazing?

There was a time when these were the stories (dreams) that people shared with others the next day. Decisions were made based on these stories. They were important. What happened? Who began saying “just a dream?” implying they were not anything?

Well, science has come full circle. Dreams are important. You are important. Your inner life is important. Technology can identify the regions of the brain that are active during dreaming. It is the same area of the brain that processes memories and emotions while we are awake. Life events can show up in your dreams over and over (recurring dreams) or bring us nightmares to get our attention.

Are you interested in your dream stories? Here are some ways to reap the benefits of your dream stories:

1. When you wake up, don’t jump up. Lie still with your eyes closed and concentrate on what you were just dreaming about. Don’t worry if you can’t remember everything. A word or two, a snippet of a scene will do. Then, write what you remember in your journal that you keep by your bed. It is not necessary that you “get” the story. Just as you wouldn’t open up a novel and read a random page, you wouldn’t expect to know what the novel is about. Your dream is like that. A page in your life. But over time, when you read more pages, you will see recurring themes, people, words, places, etc.

2. There are many books written on how to understand dreams. They are like cookbooks. They are only suggestions that may give you a hint at your dream’s meaning. Don’t take them as gospel. In fact, don’t take your dreams literally. Murdering or loving someone you know does not predict anything about them. The dreams are about you. Try free association to get at the real meaning. For example, in the case of murdering, what needs to change or be put to rest in your life? Loving someone that is taboo? What are the impressions you have of that person? The dream could mean you are longing to have a more social life or to show those aspects of your personality in your waking life.

3. You may have had a dream where you knew you were dreaming. These are called Lucid Dreams. We know that people can learn to use this type of dream to change the dream, the outcome of the dream. If the monster shows up in your dream, you can take charge and shrink it to the size of a toy or chase it away. This can reduce stress that comes from unresolved emotions, such as comes from traumatic events.

4. Since you create every aspect of your dream, you can imagine you are everything in the dream. It’s a Gestalt way of understanding dreams. For example, if you are driving a red car in your dream, you could ask yourself what it would be like to be a red car. Would you be seen more easily? Could you go fast? Are you afraid of something going too fast? And what would the road say? What’s it like to be driven over? Are you the driver or the passenger in the car? You can see how one memory of your dream serves to bring you information about your inner life that continues in your waking life, often unawares.

5. Imagine yourself sitting around the table (campfire) etc. and telling your dreams to others. What parts would you leave out? Why? We are secret story tellers, still. Once upon a time, the part you leave out may be the part that is most important. It still is. Unless you have a therapist or like-minded friends, it probably is best not to share them with just anyone. But, that doesn’t mean you have no way to understand your story. Your journal will become your friend. You could use your phone to record your dreams stories as well as the insights that pop into your mind during the day.

6. The best part and the hardest for a writer to write is the ending of a story. I still like the ones that end with “happily ever after” even though I’ve come to appreciate the novels that leave me hanging. That’s more like life, isn’t it? You may think you should make a decision, take action because a dream inspired you, like divorce, move away to a desert island, etc. Maybe but sit with that for a while. Ask yourself if you are taking this literally. Is it healthy, practical, or realistic? Don’t throw those ideas away. Remember, it was one page in your novel. What will the next chapter reveal?

Can you use some coaching or therapy help? 

For more personalized help developing a strategy that will help you create the life you truly want, please consider coaching or therapy. This is the perfect time to get started. Every journey starts with a first step.

We can talk it over and decide the best way forward. Questions? Email me at patriciabrawley@earthlink.net.