Category Archives: Uncategorized

Are You in Love With Old Stories?

1-Are You in Love with Your Old Stories-image1Emma was a successful business owner who always told herself, “I’m not good with money.” She used this story as an excuse to not pay attention to the numbers in her business. She was constantly behind on her taxes and she procrastinated getting an LLC set up, even though she knew it would protect her.

But one day, a friend and fellow business owner called out Emma on what she was saying. Her friend told her that this story was holding her back from the next level of success. It was Emma’s way of playing small and staying safe.

What’s Your Story?

Every day, people create narratives about their lives. These are the stories they tell themselves about who they are, where they came from, and what they want.

Maybe you believe you’re a messy person. Saying that you’re messy means you don’t have to be responsible for cleaning up. Or perhaps you say, “I just don’t like people. They drive me crazy. I’m a hermit, this is just how I am.”

What Are You Gaining from This Story?

You can’t shed an old story until you understand why you keep holding onto it. For example, if you tell yourself you’re a hermit, you don’t have to step out of your comfort zone and get to know people. This story feels like it’s keeping you safe because you don’t have to risk getting to know other people.

Maybe your story helps you avoid responsibility. If you insist that you’re too disorganized to run a business, then you don’t have to take responsibility for turning your hobby into the business you’ve always dreamed of.

What Would Happen If You Let This Story Go?

If you’ve identified a story in your own life that isn’t serving you, ask yourself what would happen if you let it go. If you decide that you’re no longer a hermit, how would your life change? Would you start reaching out to the people around you? Would you build a wide network of friends that are eager to support and love on you?

If you decide that you can become organized and run your own business, what would that look like for you? Would you be able to pay off your debts and help your spouse quit that job he hates? Would you be able to send your kids to that private school you’ve always hoped they could attend?

Why New Stories Energize You

Emma took her friend’s words to heart and she got started creating a new story. She hired a bookkeeper so she knows exactly how much she earns. She started paying her taxes on time so she’s not behind anymore. She even filed for that LLC license she needed. Now, Emma doesn’t feel stressed about numbers. This means she’s free to spend her time on creating more products for the community she loves serving.

Letting go of old stories sets you free. It gives you energy and makes you see the world in a new way. It also helps you create space for more of what you love and want in your life.

If you need help with healing something or finding balance in your life, get information or schedule your own Discovery Session with me HERE.

The 4 Easy Things to Do to Live Your Vision

photo-1455596120412-30a2e6c8e600Are you enjoying the summer yet? My garden plants are finally growing and there is always something new to see.  I have a vision. Don’t you think it’s good to have a vision of what you want to do in your life and work?

Sometimes my vision of helping people seems huge and overwhelming. How many clients can I see? How many students can I teach?  However, that same vision can be inspiring and restorative. When someone meets his/her goal, like when someone takes a step out into a new career, it’s all worth it.

Here are 4 things I’ve learned about living your vision.  

1. Let it live. Don’t hold on so tightly to a certain way it has to happen or look.  Stop saying: “One day” or “When things are right, etc.” and start saying “today”. Please look at the short video below featuring Wayne Dyer to see why this is so.

2. Break your vision down like a recipe. What are all the parts of your vision? Some items are like a pinch of salt and others are 4 cups of peeled potatoes. It is more manageable this way.

3. Get your calendar out and pencil in a baby step every day. Always make rest a baby step because good ideas come when you are walking or resting or in the shower. Remember to write them down!

4. Let the vision of your life align with your other visions / goals. Design your life to have what you want in it. Do you want to live closer to family? In a different  house? Do you want more freedom, adventure, travel, quiet retreat time, or time to write?

Perhaps your vision has changed from the one you had years ago. Feel what is true for you.

When you take a step, spirit will match it.


Listen to what Wayne Dyer had to say about this in his video HERE. (This video is presented by Hay House 2017.)

If you need help with healing something or finding balance in your life, get information or schedule your own Discovery Session with me HERE.

Try Hopping on One Leg

one_foot_hop_discountDo you need a little balance in your life? Tired of trying to do everything standing on one leg?

I get a funny picture in my mind when I picture myself trying to get everything done hopping around on one leg. You too? It feels like the harder I try to do everything, the harder it is to see the end in sight.

What would success or “the end” of my to- do list look like? Think about this for yourself. Would we be able to move on to more projects? Would we enjoy the present moment and not wait until a time in an imagined future? Would we take good care of ourselves? What challenges would you face?

One way to look at this is to remember the 80/20 principle. This is known as the Pareto Principle, which states that 20% of what we do produces 80% of results. So, if we identify the times when we are most happy and productive (remember the 20% produces 80% of our good feelings), then we can increase whatever we are doing in the 20% category, right? Let that other stuff go. The flip side is to identify the times we are least happy and productive and reduce that as much as possible.

However, I tend to be a laid-back workaholic most days. This is not helpful when trying to find balance in work and family life. I know. I could join Workaholics Anonymous, a 12-step program similar to Alcoholics Anonymous or I could obsess about things work related, problems in living, and doing three things at once.

The answer is found in the poem, ‘The Guest House” (see above).

Welcome everything. This is what it is like to have this feeling show up, this experience linger, this thought spinning in my head.

Feel free to email me your thoughts or just say hello at patriciabrawley@earthlink.net.

Eliminating Morning Stress

3-Eliminating Morning Stress-image1Everyone experiences a stressful morning occasionally. It might be that your alarm clock didn’t ring or your car wouldn’t start. Maybe you forgot the report you needed at the house or you left your grocery list on the kitchen counter.

If your mornings always feel stressful, then it’s a sign something needs to change. The good news is most morning stress can be eliminated by creating new habits. It can take a while for a habit to become routine but once it does, your morning will be so much smoother. Here’s how you can reclaim your mornings:

Prepare the night before.
A lot of morning stress can be eliminated by preparing for the morning in advance. Choose your clothes the night before so you already know what you’re going to wear. Pack your lunch and leave it in the fridge so you only have to grab it as you head out.

Skip the news.
Thanks to smartphones and tablets, you can now check the news without ever having to leave the comfort of your bed. But reading or viewing the latest new stories can cause you to experience anxiety and discouragement. Instead of looking forward to a new day, you feel overwhelmed and fearful.

This doesn’t mean you have to avoid the news all day. Staying connected to what’s happening around you is important. But pick and choose what types of news you really need to hear first thing in the morning. For example, you could look over the entertainment news or sport scores but choose to skip the main headlines until later.

Play positive tunes.
Create a morning playlist of music that makes you feel encouraged and play it as you’re starting your day. This will help you wake up and make it easier for you to focus on the positive. Music can also boost your productivity and creativity.

Don’t check your email or social media.
Most people experience their highest energy levels after waking up. Yet the first thing you may be tempted to do is check your email and social media networks. The problem with this is your inbox and networks are often filled with “urgent” messages. These urgent messages quickly crowd out the important tasks you need to get done today. The next thing you know it’s noon and all you’ve accomplished is answering your email and checking social media.

To prevent this, don’t check your email or social networks until later. After an hour or two of working, take a break to check your messages. Since you’ve already tackled the important tasks today, you can devote as much energy as needed to the urgent tasks you ignored earlier.

Morning stress can be a sign that it’s time to step back and evaluate your routines. Look at what’s causing you the most stress and seek simple solutions to fix them. By doing this, you can change your mornings from stressful to delightful!

Be a Morning Person

 

5 Ways Get More Love in Your Life

downloadMost people like to have good feelings about their relationship.  Then, one day, they would like to have more.

More of something…like more attention, more money, more sex, more good home cooking and a clean house, vacations, gifts. I could keep going but you know what I mean.

In order to start having more love in your life, you’ll want to look at these 5 relationship mistakes.

1.) Stop looking at your past relationships unless you’ve previously achieved the ideal relationship.

Your past has no bearing on what you can create today.

If you’ve had good relationships in the past, then look at what was different for you in that relationship. Did you focus on the other person’s needs and wants? Did you feel loved? How did you treat your honey? How did you feel about him/her? In other words, what were you doing different than you are now or could be doing now.

2.) Don’t beat yourself up about the current state of your relationship.

It doesn’t make sense to beat yourself up, feel guilty, or less than. You can’t get on with improving your relationships if you dwell on the negative. Get your mind into the creative space of creating what you want, not settling for what is.

3.) Take your attention off keeping score.

While it may seem that you do all the work keeping your relationship alive and you don’t think the other person is pulling his/her own weight, it’s more important to see each other as people doing the best they can. Make a decision to eliminate this habit and give all your energy to attracting what you want in the relationship. Hint: the blame game does not endear you to anyone.

4.) Let go of wishing for the miracle solution.

Do you notice that the harder you try to hunt down the miracle solution to your problems, you feel even more powerless? Trust that your solution will come once you’ve decided ———————- fill in the blank. .

Remember the times when you hit an all-time low point (in relationships, income, etc.) and you had no clue how you would dig yourself out of the “mess” you’d created. Kinda zaps the creative spirit, doesn’t it?  But once you decided to take the situation back into your control, little by little, solutions revealed themselves.The baby steps you can take now will create an avalanche of good relationships. Some solutions will show up in ways you don’t plan, such as taking care of yourself.

5.) Never sell your soul to have love.

Don’t try to “fix” yourself just to align with someone else. It feels like taking on an extra      job and forcing yourself to go to work. Don’t lower your values out of desperation. These         actions will not get you further ahead in the love game because the energy behind them    is desperation.  Yes, you may need to take some actions to improve yourself such as working on your communication skills, but make sure your heart feels it’s the right decision and you are doing it for you and your partner because you want to, not because you feel you have to.

If you like this article, you may want to sign up to get my free e-course on Simple Acts of Love to Overcome Loneliness.  Whether you are totally content in your life or you feel lonely and out of touch, incorporating this into your life will totally change your outlook and make you happier than you’ve ever imagined.

Sign up and get it immediately to find out why HERE.

When You Meet Your Goal

You’ve worked hard and accomplished your goal. Now, you deserve to kick back and celebrate your success. There are many ways that you can choose to celebrate.

You could buy yourself something new, which is a great way to celebrate reaching an ideal weight. You could take a day off and spend the time with your family, which is a great way to celebrate leaving your day job. You could get a relaxing massage or visit a local spa, which is a great way to celebrate the success of a difficult goal.

Create a Keepsake

You can also mark the completion of a goal with a keepsake. You could add a charm to a necklace or bracelet. You can buy an art print to hang on your wall. Some people even choose to celebrate by getting a tattoo.

The important thing is to not let your success pass you by uncelebrated. You worked hard and you deserve recognition for your hard work and personal growth.

Review Your Success

No matter how you choose to celebrate, you should also take time to review your journey. Recording your thoughts and feelings in a journal is a great way to do this.

While you’re journaling, you might want to include what made you decide to go after your goal, what worked for you, setbacks you experienced, and how you feel now.

Show Your Appreciation

Once you’ve celebrated your success, it’s time to thank your supporters. Maybe your mom watched your kids three times a week so you could make it to the gym. Maybe your spouse believed in your business when you were just starting out. Maybe you had a mentor who provided advice that helped you succeed.

You should always thank the people in your community that stood by you during the journey. But don’t stop there. Ask how you can return the blessing. Look for ways that you can support the dreams of the community that supported your dream.

Decide What’s Next

It’s not uncommon to reach a goal you’ve been after for a long time and suddenly find yourself restless. You took the time to celebrate your accomplishment and you thanked your community. But now you’re filled with energy and don’t know what to do next.

Now, you should begin looking for your next goal. It doesn’t have to be directly related to the one you just accomplished. But do pick another goal that makes you just as passionate as the one before it did.

If you don’t acknowledge your journey, then you can’t learn from it. That’s why you should always celebrate when you reach a goal. You’ve earned it.

I hope you have enjoyed my series on goal setting. Please let me know if you did and what you were able to achieve. I love to hear from you! 

Click here to download the goal setting workbook.

Break Your New Goal Into Steps

Break your new goal into steps-2Once you’ve set your mind on a goal and cleared away distractions, you’re ready to get started working. But first, you need to do some planning. When you plan in advance and use that plan, you’re more likely to succeed with your goals.

You can make a list of things to do to reach your goal. But it’s usually easier to start by evaluating what you need to make your goal a reality.

Tools or Supplies

What tools or supplies will you need in order to meet your goal? If you’re starting a blog, you’ll need a website and hosting. If you’re aiming to lose weight, you’ll need a food scale and measuring cups. If you’re starting a jewelry business, then you’ll need modeling clay to make charms and necklace thread.

You also need to consider supplies you may have forgotten about. If you’re starting a business, you may need child care. If you’re changing your diet, you may need new recipe books to help you prepare healthier meals.

Specialized Help

Sometimes, you can’t achieve your goals by yourself. That’s where specialized help comes in. Specialized help can take many forms. It might be hiring a personal trainer so you can get the toned body you want. It might be hiring a business coach to help you book enough clients to pay your bills.

Specialized help can sometimes be expensive. But if your goal is important to you, don’t be afraid to invest in it. Some coaches and trainers may be willing to work with you to develop a payment plan so be sure to ask if this is an option.

Support from Friends and Family

You can’t succeed in a bubble. In order to reach your goals, you’ll need the support of your family and friends. If your family and friends can’t be supportive, you should look for the support elsewhere.

Joining a support group or finding an online community can be helpful in these situations. Look for groups and communities that leave you feeling upbeat and are filled with people that want to achieve similar goals.

Return the Support

It’s easy to get so wrapped up in your new goal that you forget to invest in others. If you’re part of a group or community, make sure that you offer help to other members. Be willing to take time from your day to support someone else.

Now that you do know what you need in order to succeed, it’s time to go after your goal. It’s scary to take that first step, but you have to be willing to do it. Once you’ve taken that first step, you’ll experience a rush of confidence and increased motivation.

Click here to download the goal setting workbook.

Make Room for the New Goal

Make Room for the New Goal-2When you set a goal, you have to make room for it in your life. Most people find that they have to change their priorities in order to reach their goal. If the goal is important to you and you’re committed to achieving it, then this step is crucial to your success.

What Can I Give Up?

This is the question you need to ask yourself when trying to fit your goal into your busy life. Look for leisure activities. Do you watch three hours of Netflix every night? Could you drop that down to one hour so you could use the remaining two to work on your newest goal? What about games you play on your iPad in the afternoon? Can you use that time to focus on your goal instead?

If you’re having trouble finding time you can use for your goal, install a time tracker on your laptop or tablet. At the end of your day, many time tracking apps will give you a summary of how you spent your time. This is a great way to discover pockets of time that you could be using to achieve your goal.

What Can You Put on the Back Burner?

Another way to find time for your goal is to make a list of projects that won’t be prioritized while you work on this goal. You can put this list aside and leave a note on your calendar to review these projects later.

When you do this, you’ll be able to fully focus on your goal. You’ll see progress faster, which will motivate you even more. You’ll also increase your chances of success and feel more positive about your goal.

What’s in Conflict?

Many people fail to reach their goals because they have conflicting goals. These conflicting goals are sneaky and it can be hard to spot them. For example, your goal may be to spend more time with your kids in the evening. Now if you set another goal to go back to college to finish your degree in the evenings, you’ve created two goals that are in conflict with each other.

When it comes to goals in conflict, don’t think you have to pick one or the other. Instead, look for solutions that allow you to bring your goals into harmony. Using the above example, you could decide that you’ll go back to college in the evenings for three nights a week. But you’ll use the remaining four nights to spend more time with your kids.

Making room for your goals isn’t always easy, but it is necessary to your success. Remember that if you don’t follow through with your goal, nothing will change.

Click here to download the goal setting workbook.

Are You Goal Focused?

Are You Goal Focused-1This may be the first question to ask yourself when thinking about how you’d like to make progress / set goals this year.

In order to set a goal, you have to know where you’re headed but most people have no clear direction. They don’t know what they’re working toward and they have no way to gauge their success or failure.

Think of it like being an airline pilot. You can go into the cockpit and sit down. You may know what all the controls do but you have no destination or flight plan. How do you know if you did your job? How do you know if you arrived where you intended to be?

The simple answer is you don’t. That’s what it’s like to coast through life without goals. Goals are your flight plan. They help you chart a path from where you are right now to where you want to be. Without a plan, you’re just flying around in circles and burning valuable fuel.

Setting Goals Requires Commitment

Setting a goal doesn’t matter if you aren’t willing to commit to seeing it through. It’s the equivalent of coming up with a flight plan but never setting foot in the cockpit. Following through on a goal is hard and it can be scary. But if you’re not happy with your life, you’re the only one that can change it.

Are You Willing to Take Responsibility?

Most people fail at reaching their goals because they neglect to change their mindset. It’s easy to make excuses for why you aren’t achieving your goals. You may tell yourself that you don’t have the time or money to pursue your goals. You may tell yourself that you were dealt a bad hand in life and you can’t do anything to change it.

You have to be willing to set these excuses aside and take responsibility for your life. When a pilot sits down in the cockpit, they take responsibility for the aircraft. They can’t make excuses because they have the lives of other people in their hands and so do you. You have your life in your hands. What you choose to do with it is your responsibility.

Know What Your Finish Line Looks Like

To meet a goal, you have to be focused on the finish line. It’s easier to binge on Netflix than it is to work toward you goals. That’s why it’s important that you have a visual reminder of the finish line.

This finish line image can be a picture of the island where you’ll go on vacation after you’ve gotten out of debt or a collage of what your home office will look like when you finally earn enough to quit your job. Focusing on your finish line keeps you motivated and increases your chances of success.

Becoming goal focused is difficult and requires discipline. But if what you want is important to you, then you’ll find a way to reach your goals and live the life you want.

Click here to download the full e-book journal with all 4 steps to goal setting.

Click here to download the goal setting workbook.